Sun 9:30a Class; 10:30a Worship; 11:35a Communion
Bible Bites
Try These Solutions to Family Strife
Do you know of any family that does not have troubles these days? For that matter, has there ever been a family free from problems and difficulties? Beware of anyone who tries to convince you he has always had a “perfect” family. Families are com- posed of people. People can, and often do, sin. Where there is sin, there is always trouble. Sometimes, the trouble is small and easily remedied. At other times, sin creates such a mess that it appears too large and difficult to resolve. Is there any hope for families who are plagued with problems? Most certainly! Consider these solutions:
Don't Divorce
Most people who encounter marital and family problems seek what appears to be the simple solution:. divorce. Yet, di- vorce is rarely the answer to family trouble. It brings about unique difficulties on its own. Besides, it is sinful to walk away
from a valid marriage. God's marriage rule is “one man, one woman, for life” (Mt. 19:1-11). Only one exception is given to this rule. A spouse who is sinned against sexually may choose to end the marriage. It must be emphasized that even this exception is not mandatory. It may not be best to sunder a marriage simply because one partner has been sexually unfaithful, although the Lord gives that option. Regardless, divorce is never easy. It is not a clean -cut surgical procedure without pain or a difficult recovery. “Family law” is a booming legal specialty in our nation. Frivolous divorce is a plague on our society and it under- mines God's intent for marriage. If you are searching for a solution to troubled marriage, it will not usually come from the services of divorce attorneys and judges.
Seek Proper Counsel
When family troubles arise, a counselor will often be sought. Ordinarily, this is a good thing to pursue. But the advice you receive is only as good as the advisor who offers it. Christians who are mature in faith are “able also to admonish one an-
other” (Rom. 15:14). However, many “marriage and family therapists” are “blind guides” who have neither the respect nor the regard they should have for God's will for the family. They may be licensed by the State, but they fail in integrity for upholding the law of Heaven concerning marriage and family life. Attorneys and therapists may encourage what God would not allow. Even trusted family members may misadvise you. Many advise that we should seek personal happiness above a commitment we made in the past to be married "until death we do part:' Seek the advice of someone who will uphold God's will concern- ing marriage and family. Many Christians fail to do this when marriage troubles arise, and they exchange their soul for the bad advice they receive and follow.
Repent
This may sound harsh at first. But to get to the bottom of family troubles, each person involved must be willing to do the right thing. Look carefully at your own faults to see if you are contributing to the problem. Once you have addressed self, you
are then in a position to help others in the family who are causing difficulty (Mt. 7:1-5). Many family problems result from a failure to see self as part of the problem. It is easy to see your spouse's failings or your children's errors while completely over- looking your own. Even if your erring spouse will not own up to his or her contributions to the problems you face, your situa- tion will be better when you deal properly with your own sins. Remember, you cannot correct anyone's errors but your own.
Forgive
This one suggestion alone would empty divorce courts, stop child custody battles, and free hearts from anger, guilt, and sin! Some families have never really practiced forgiveness! They fuss and feud but they do not forgive and forget! Families who
stay together forgive one another when genuine repentance has been demonstrated. They seek ways to bless rather than curse each other. In fact, without forgiveness, a family is doomed to fail. No relationship between humans can long survive without genuine acknowledgment of wrongs and liberal forgiveness for sins committed against another. To make family life better we must freely, frequently, and fully forgive!
— In Biblical Insights, July 2014
